You’re likely under the impression that bringing dinosaurs back to life is a fiddly affair, and for good reason. You didn’t get your GCSE in cloning using paleo-DNA from either bones or the guts of mosquitoes in amber and John Hammon never text you back. Please don’t cry. It’s easier than you think. All you need is a flame and this Hatching Dinosaur Candle. I thought you told me earlier that you took risks… well now is the time to take said risks and hatch a dinosaur for mankind.
As the wax egg melts away it slowly reveals the world’s favourite prehistoric carnivore – a darling baby velociraptor. Not your average porcelain ornament, this triassic treasure is sure to add a little life to your gaff.
The best part? You have the opportunity to have this little fella imprint you as the pack alpha, ready to follow your every command. Now lets talk about having to take care of an actual prehistoric carnivore with sickle-shaped claws in your one-bedroom apartment, but first, I am going to remove your number from my phone and I’ll check back in 6 to 9 months from now to see if you can handle your new found pet.