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Puns, Puns & More Puns!

Puns are a short form of paronomasia. It is a word play, used for fun, containing double meaning or replacing similar sounding words with one another. This is done to bring about a witty and rhetorical effect. There are two types of puns: one-liners and questions. Puns are now covering a vast area on social media where people enjoy their time laughing. It is all about playing with words to have fun and entertainment. Apart from social media, puns are used in comedy shows as well, encouraging humor and spreading smiles everywhere. Puns are not just a part of modern life, but they have been carried forward from Shakespearean times. William Shakespeare is known to have used a lot of puns in his work, for example, given below is an example of pun, pun, and more puns:

“Now is the winter of our discontent made glorious summer by this son of York.”

Here, Shakespeare meant the sun. Instead, he wrote son. This is how puns have been used all along to spread the fun.

Puns nowadays are delivered in a more casual way than before. It makes sure that you have a good time laughing with your friends. Following is a small collection of some puns:

  1. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink. One of the puns, puns, and more puns.
  2. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  3. How did I escape Iraq? Iran.
  4. Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball.
  5. A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
  6. Q: What did one ocean say to the other ocean? A: Nothing, they just waved.
  7. You’re so ugly, when your mom dropped you off at school she got a fine for littering.
  8. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
  9. Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m OK, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
  10. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put it down.
  11. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
  12. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
  13.  I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.
  14.  I’d tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn’t get a reaction.
  15.  Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m OK, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
  16.  I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  17.  A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
  18.  Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
  19.  Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It’s very time consuming.
  20. Why don’t programmers like nature? It has too many bugs.
  21. The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
  22. If there was someone selling drugs in this place, weed know.
  23. A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy.
  24. When notes get in treble, bass-ically they get put behind bars. The alto-nate punishment is to push them off a clef and hope they land flat on sharp objects.
  25. A prisoner’s favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
  26. I used to be a banker but I lost interest
  27. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
  28. I once got into so much debt that I couldn’t even afford my electricity bills, they were the darkest times of my life.
  29. I don’t trust these stairs because they’re always up to something.
  30. It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.
  31. When William joined the army he disliked the phrase ‘fire at will’.
  32. I relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.
  33. So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means!? It’s not the end of the world!
  34. The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize.
  35. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.
  36. Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking outside the box.
  37. I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
  38. I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech’ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter ‘Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite’.
  39. The shoemaker did not deny his apprentice anything he needed. He gave his awl.
  40. A new type of broom came out, it is sweeping the nation.
  41. What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.
  42. I once heard a joke about amnesia, but I forgot how it goes.
  43. The roundest knight at king Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
  44. A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired.
  45. I’m glad I know sign language, it’s pretty handy.
  46. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
  47. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said ‘No change yet’.
  48. My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
  49. Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.
  50. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing – but it let out a little whine.
  51. I knew a woman who owned a taser, man was she stunning!
  52. When Peter Pan punches, they Neverland.
  53. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
  54. There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn’t control his pupils.
  55. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
  56. The girl quit her job at the doughnut factory because she was fed up with the hole business.
  57. The other day I held the door open for a clown. I thought it was a nice jester.
  58. Is old rope good enough for a hanging? Frayed knot. That stuff is bad noose.
  59. I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.
  60. I think Santa has riverfront property in Brazil. All our presents came from Amazon this year.
  61. I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.
  62. It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
  63. Atheists don’t solve exponential equations because they don’t believe in higher powers.
  64. There was a sign on the lawn at a drug re-hab center that said ‘Keep off the Grass’.
  65. I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
  66. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  67. What do dogs do after they finish obedience school? They get their masters.
  68. The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  69. It’s a lengthy article on Japanese Sword Fighters but I can Samurais it for you.

We are pretty sure these puns made you laugh, or at least made you smile. You can create your own by simply playing with different words. One can never get bored of such puns.

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